Triste

Played marathon WoW this weekend. No mood to do anything really. Especially when you have the feeling of losing someone, well sort of losing. It was a bad idea to watch Be With Me, at least for me. It was sad, almost well up with tears at the beginning. It all went downhill from there. The only pocket of happiness is where the 2 girls were having their “honeymoon period”. I miss Grandma really much. Uncle James is going too, I should pay my respects, or say bye or something. edwin is right about the show being good, but it’s the other portions that are good. So many things come to mind watching that show, old age, first kiss, the look and feel one gives another. I just want to curl up like an armadillo. Don’t even want to go to work tomorrow. But I think I have to. Maybe take half day off, won’t expect anything going on too. I am so down. I wish I have someone now, but I know I will never have. I think I have lost the meaning of Love. heh, lucky me

Oh, this dismay feeling of down-ness must be because my birthday is coming. I dread birthdays. Year after year I hope for a happier one but it seems more and more grey and solemn. Now I just wish it would quickly pass and I can get on my way to a miserable and lonely death. In a weird way, I am looking forward to my demise, so that I can see the joy and the true beauty of everything when I am too late to embrace it.

Ah.. tis my life,

Music for the moment, on my playlist
Trust by The Cure
Mad World by Gary Jules
Blower’s daughter by Daimen Rice
Let go by Nada Surf

Depressing, yes, but in memory of those lost, just bring in on, stack it up, and gobble it down with a serving of bitterness.

There is a wishlist on my hi 5, I do not know what material items I should have, I guess I am greedy